1. Atmabhranti - The Deepest Disease and the Path to Healing.

Atmabhranti sam rog nahi, Sadguru vaidya sujaan;
Guruajna sam pathya nahi, aushadh vichar dhyan.

- Verse 129, Shri Atmasiddhi Shaastra by Shrimad Rajchandra

---

Atmabhranti (Self-delusion) is described as the gravest of all diseases. This delusion is not merely intellectual error; it is existential misidentification. To consider the body as the Self, or to believe that body and soul are one, is the fundamental distortion.

Since beginningless time, this misidentification has persisted. It has resulted in continuous karmic association. This condition is not imposed externally; the soul itself is the locus of this bondage. However, this does not imply a conscious starting point i.e. ignorance itself is beginningless. Yet, whatever it is, it is and the state is experienced by the soul today / now.

Anyhow, the disease is deep-rooted, persistent, and self-sustained.

---

The verse then presents the Sadguru (the Enlightened Master) as an expert physician. This analogy is structurally precise: one who has directly experienced the Self is not operating on belief, but on realization, and therefore can indicate the path to liberation with clarity.

However, even the most capable physician remains ineffective for me unless I, as the patient:

1. Accept that I am diseased

2. Trust the diagnosis and the guide

3. Follow the prescribed discipline

This raises a critical question:

Do I truly accept that I am in a state of delusion?
Or has this condition become so normalized over infinite time that it no longer appears as a disease?

If delusion is not acknowledged as a disease, then even in the presence of a Sadguru, the possibility of healing does not arise. The Sadguru can indicate, explain, and guide, but unless I recognize myself as the one afflicted, the process of healing does not begin.

---

Let me assume, for a moment, that this acceptance arises:

• That delusion is indeed a disease

• That there exists an Enlightened Being who has transcended it

• That such a Being can guide the path to liberation

What follows from this?

---

The verse provides a direct answer:

• “Guruajna sam pathya nahi” : There is no regimen like the instructions of the Sadguru

• “Aushadh vichar dhyan” : The medicine is contemplation and meditation

This introduces two measurable indicators of sincerity:

1. Do I actually follow the instructions of the Sadguru?

2. Do I engage in Vichar (contemplation) and Dhyan (meditative awareness)?

Without these, acceptance remains conceptual; not transformative.

---

This leads to another necessary inquiry:

What are the core instructions of the Sadguru?

Across time, past, present, and future, the realized beings articulate a consistent path. This is also affirmed in Verse 36 of Atmasiddhi Shaastra: there is only one path to the supreme truth across time.

Distilled to essentials, the instructions can be understood as:

1. Reduction of Raag (attachment) and Dvesh (aversion)
   Not suppression, but understanding and gradual dissolution.

2. Recognition of the true identity as the Self (soul)
   Distinct from body, mind, and transient states.

3. Cultivation of the witnessing stance (saakshi bhaav)
   At the absolute level, the soul is knower-seer.
   At the practical level, this must be progressively realized; not prematurely assumed.

4. Sustained inward orientation (antarmukhta)
   Not a necessary withdrawal from action, but withdrawal from identification.

These are not independent steps; they are interdependent dimensions of the same effort (purusharth).

---

Now, the medicine:

• Vichar (Contemplation)
  Observing thoughts, tendencies, and reactions with clarity, without reinforcing attachment or aversion.

• Dhyan (Meditation)
  In Jain understanding, this includes both:

  • disciplined practice

  • and the eventual state of steady awareness

Meditation is not merely a passive experience; it is cultivated through right effort and right understanding.

---

At deeper examination, Vichar and Dhyan are not separate processes. They converge.

Sustained contemplation refines awareness.
Refined awareness stabilizes into meditative absorption.

This confluence weakens delusion.

---

Critical Self-Check

If I claim:

• The world does not bind me, but my attachment does

• Delusion is a disease

• The Sadguru is a true guide

Then the only valid verification is:

• Do I reduce Raag-Dvesh in real situations?

• Do I remain aware of the Self amidst activity?

• Do I consistently engage in contemplation and meditation?

If not, then the acceptance, alas, is theoretical.

---

Conclusion

Atmabhranti is not an abstract concept. It is the operative condition of embodied existence.

The Sadguru provides the diagnosis, the regimen, and the medicine, but the walking of the path is non-transferable.

It demands sustained purusharth: a continuous effort to remain aware, to abide in saakshi bhaav, and to prevent identification with thoughts, words, and actions. This requires, especially in the beginning, a deliberate and repeated training of the mind; an ongoing discipline to loosen craving and aversion at their point of origin.

The path is singular, consistent across time, and experiential in nature.
Liberation is not granted. It is realized through the dissolution of delusion.

14. The Infinite Journey - Conclusion but not the End.

In continuation with the previous blog (https://so-what-dilip.blogspot.com/2026/03/12-infinite-journey-continues.html)....

Having seen that the Soul, from the empirical standpoint, functions as the doer (karta) and consumer (bhokta), a fundamental question becomes unavoidable:

If this cycle of doing and experiencing has continued since beginningless time,
does it ever end?

And if it does:
What exactly ends, and what remains?

The earlier understanding makes one thing clear:
Bondage is not accidental.
It is structured, continuous, and self-sustained through identification with arising states.

If that is so, then liberation cannot be an event of chance, grace, or external intervention.
It must be a precise reversal of the very mechanism that sustains bondage.

At this point, the 5th and 6th propositions of the Soul become relevant:

• The Soul is Liberation (Moksha)

• The Soul is the Path to Liberation

This requires careful understanding.

Liberation is not something the Soul becomes.
Nor is it something newly produced.

The Soul, in its intrinsic nature, is already free from all karmic attributes.

What is called bondage is the association with karmic modifications.
What is called liberation is the complete cessation of that association.

Therefore, the question is no longer philosophical.

It becomes immediate and practical:

If the Soul is already pure in its nature,
What sustains the impurity in experience?

And more importantly,
What exactly must change NOW for that to dissolve?

---

The Question of Karma and Its End

The inevitable change is the complete cessation of karma.

But the difficulty is evident:

If both good (shubh) and bad (ashubh) karmas are constantly being attracted and accumulated,
and if this accumulation has continued from beginningless time,
how does one ever become free?

And further...
how long would such a process take?

At first glance, the task appears immeasurable.

However, a critical insight must be understood:

Just as karmas bear fruits for the soul,
the cessation of karmas is also a real and effective process.

Yes, infinite time has been spent in shubh and ashubh states.
But transcendence need not operate on the same axis as accumulation.

Accumulation is gradual.
Cessation, once and when rightly initiated, could be transformational.

(This is elaborated further down below)

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The Mechanism of Bondage

Karma does not bind randomly.

Its principal causes are:

• Attachment

• Aversion

• Indulgence

• Likes and dislikes

• Ignorance (fundamental misidentification)

These are not superficial tendencies.
They are the core knots that sustain karmic continuity.

As long as identification persists, bondage persists.

---

The Mechanism of Release

The weakening of these knots begins with:

• Awareness

• Inner alertness

• Remaining established as a conscious knower

With sustained practice, this evolves into:

A state where the individual increasingly abides as the witness of all experiences.

This shift is critical.

Because karma binds not due to action alone,
but due to identification with action and experience.

As witnessing stabilizes, identification weakens.
As identification weakens, bondage loosens.

This is not theoretical.
It is a functional shift in the mode of being.

---

The Apparent Difficulty

Yet, a serious doubt arises:

If the karmic accumulation is of beginningless time (anant kaal),
then even gradual weakening appears insufficient.

The process seems extremely slow, tedious, and disproportionate to the scale of bondage.

This doubt is valid, but incomplete.

---

The Critical Insight: The Role of Right Vision

A profound analogy given in Shri Atmasiddhi Shaastra by revered Shrimad Rajchandra ji resolves this:

A dream may span millions of years,
yet it disappears instantly upon awakening.

Similarly,
delusion of beginningless time
dissolves immediately upon the emergence of Right Vision (Samyak Darshan).

This is the turning point.

The process is not merely gradual erosion.
It includes a discontinuous shift.

---

From Knowledge to Right Knowledge

Effort is required and is mandatory, but its direction must be precise.

This effort includes:

• Study of scriptures

• Contemplation and understanding

• Devotion

• Austerities

• Ethical and disciplined living

However, all of this, by itself, is still within the domain of Knowledge (Gyaan), not necessarily Right Knowledge (Samyak Gyaan).

The transformation happens through one decisive factor:

Right Vision (Samyak Darshan)

The moment Right Vision arises:

• Knowledge becomes Right Knowledge

• Devotion becomes Right Devotion

• Conduct becomes Right Conduct

Without this, even noble and virtuous actions remain within the domain of Shubh Karma.

Shubh Karma refines outer experience, worldly comforts, path to the beneficial inclination.
It does not directly terminate bondage.

---

The Subtle but Essential Shift

Therefore, the instruction is not to abandon action.

Actions may and should continue.

But simultaneously, there must be:

A continuous weaving of awareness
An uninterrupted inner orientation toward the witnessing self

This sustained awareness creates the condition
for the emergence of Right Vision.

---

The Gateway

And this is the decisive statement:

Samyak Darshan is the gateway to liberation.

It is not symbolic.
It is functional.

It marks the transition from:

• Identification → Observation

• Bondage → Dissolution

• Knowledge → Right Knowledge

---

What is Liberation?

Liberation (Moksha) is not a place.

It is not a destination in space or time.

It is the state of Purity of the Self.

As stated in Shri Atmasiddhi Shaastra:

“Moksh Kahyo Nij Shuddhata, Te Paame Te Panth…”
Liberation is one’s own pure nature;
the path is that which leads to its realization.

---

Closing Reflection

This journey is not limited to a doctrine, a community, or a belief system.

It is the most fundamental journey of the soul:

From identification
To awareness
From awareness
To Right Vision
From Right Vision
To complete freedom

The soul, bound since beginningless time,
continues its journey across infinite cycles.

But the same soul,
upon right understanding and right vision,
is capable of complete freedom.

The question, therefore, is no longer about time.

It is about clarity.

And that clarity, once seen, Transforms everything.

13. Mahavir.

I Am Mahavir’s Past, and Mahavir Is My Future

“I am Mahavir’s past,
and Mahavir is my future.”

These words are not symbolic. They point to a profound truth about the nature of the soul.

What Mahavir became is not a miracle reserved for one being; it is the potential of every soul.

---

At the core, the soul is Pure. Eternal, conscious, and inherently free.
Yet, in its journey through beginningless time, it becomes covered with layers of karma; subtle, self-bound, and deeply ingrained.

Mahavir did not become something new.
He realized what he truly was.

He saw “Mahavir” not as an identity, but as a paryay; a temporary state.
His focus was not on the name, the body, or the role; but on the soul beyond all of it.

And through that unwavering clarity, he became free.

---

But this did not happen suddenly.

The journey was long.
The path was not straight.
The obstacles were many.

So what made the difference?

Determination.

A clear, irreversible decision (Nirnay).

Mahavir recognized a truth:

That remaining “potentially pure” is not enough.
The goal is to become actually pure.

A pure soul does not fluctuate.
It does not depend on circumstances.
It exists in a state of infinite knowledge, perception, bliss, and energy; and not for a moment, but forever (Endlessly).

---

Born as Vardhaman, even he carried karmic baggage; just like I do.

But somewhere, across many past lives, a shift had already occurred.
A deep inner awakening had begun.

The journey of cleansing had started long before his final birth.

And in that final life, his purusharth (intense, conscious effort) aligned perfectly with his nirnay (firm inner conviction).

That alignment changed everything.

---

From renunciation to omniscience, milestones came and passed.

But Mahavir was never attached to milestones.

His destination was clear: complete liberation from all karmic bondage.

And he attained it.

---

He did not merely preach philosophy.

He shared experience.

He revealed a simple yet uncompromising truth:

There are only two directions in this beginningless existence:

• To remain entangled in karmic bondage; endlessly cycling through birth and death

• Or to free oneself completely; and exist forever in a state of pure, formless liberation

No body.
No karma.
No dependency.

Only the soul, in its absolute nature; Experiencing infinite bliss, infinitely, without interruption.

---

Today, as I celebrate "Mahavir Janma Kalyanak", a deeper question arises:

Why do I remember Mahavir?

Is it celebration?
Reverence?
Tradition?

And / Or do I strongly want to correct others who mention "Mahavir Jayanti"

OR

Is it a reminder?

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If I only celebrate Mahavir, but do not walk the path he revealed,
then I remain where I am; rotating within merit and demerit, pleasure and pain.

But if I remember him with the intent to become what he became,
then remembrance becomes transformation.

---

Mahavir is not someone to be worshipped from a distance.

He is a possibility to be realized.

---

“I am Mahavir’s past”—
because in his past, like my today's state, he had a karmic baggage.

“Mahavir is my future”—
because the same soul, when awakened, purified, and freed,
must arrive at that very state.

---

So today is not just a celebration.

It is a moment of honest introspection.

Am I merely remembering?
Or am I preparing?

---

The path is not for a day.
It is not for a ritual.
It is not for appearance.

It is a constant awareness; a continuous purusharth.

---

To remember Mahavir is to remember my own highest possibility.

And to live that remembrance,
until it becomes my reality.

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12. The Infinite Journey continues...

 The Infinite Journey continues...

Understanding Doership and Experience

In the immediate previous blog (https://so-what-dilip.blogspot.com/2026/03/11-infinite-journey.html), the focus was on the core principle that the Soul is the Knower since infinity (beginningless time) and that it has an association with Karma.

Due to this association, from the empirical standpoint, the Soul has been continuously identifying the “self” with karma and thereby slipping into the zone of doership in an almost uninterrupted manner.

Since the Soul is involved in this association and experiences the effects of Karma through its states, another perspective opens up. This connects to the 3rd and 4th propositions out of the six fundamental propositions of the Soul.

The Six Propositions:

Soul exists

Soul is permanent (no beginning and no end)

Soul is the Doer

Soul is the Experiencer (Bhogta)

Soul is Liberation

Soul is the path to Liberation

The first 2 were largely covered in the previous one with regards to the "real identity" and the "infinite journey"

Let's ponder over 3 and 4 here.

3. The Soul is the Doer

All substances undergo modifications (Paryay).

Every substance is known along with its states.

The Soul too undergoes modifications; even at the most subtle level, such as thoughts, inclinations, and internal movements.

From this perspective, it is called a doer. However, this doership is understood in three distinct ways:

a. From the Absolute Standpoint (Nischay):

The Soul is the doer only of its own intrinsic modifications — its pure knowing and seeing nature.

b. From the Empirical Standpoint (Vyavahār Naya):

In relation to karmic association, the Soul is said to be the doer of karmic actions.

c. From the Conventional Standpoint (Upchār):

The Soul is said to be the doer of external activities like building, creating, acting in the world.

4. The Soul is the Consumer (Bhogta)

Every action has a result. This is evident.

From poison comes the result of poison

From sugar comes sweetness

Just as touching fire inevitably leads to burning, in the same way, inner states such as anger, attachment, and aversion give rise to corresponding results.

These results are experienced.

Thus, from the empirical standpoint, the Soul, being associated with these states, is also called the consumer (bhokta).

The Turning Point in the Journey:

Having understood these two propositions, the journey now presents two clear directions:

I. Continuing in Bondage

The Soul, being eternal and beginningless, continues its journey with karmic accumulation; both merit (shubh) and demerit (ashubh).

This cycle has been ongoing since infinity.

II. Moving Towards Liberation

The other path is to consciously move towards cleansing karmic bondage, allowing the intrinsic purity (shuddh swaroop) of the Soul to manifest fully.

Liberation is not something newly created; it is the complete revelation of what already is.

A crucial shift in understanding:

Even now, from the empirical standpoint, the Soul continues as Karta (doer) and Bhokta (consumer).

However, if there arises a true inner intent for freedom, then effort must shift towards:

👉 Remaining in pure knowing (upayog)

👉 Observing every arising state without identification

Guiding Insight from Shri AtmaSiddhi Shastra composed by Shrimad Rajchandra ji.

Karta bhokta karm no,

Vibhaav varte jyaay,

Vrutti vahe nij bhaav ma,

Thayo akarta tyaay.

Where the Soul abides in its own nature, it is no longer the doer.

Understanding Karma in Real Time:

Karma will continue to rise (uday).

Situations will unfold.

Thoughts will arise.

These are outcomes of past associations.

However, an important precision:

👉 The Soul is responsible for its current inner state (bhaav)

👉 The unfolding of events is governed by karmic fruition

The Subtle Trap:

If I respond with:

“I will tolerate this”

“I will act positively”

Even then, subtle doership persists.

Good responses → Shubh karma

Negative responses → Ashubh karma

In both cases, bondage continues.

The Shift from Doing to Knowing:

The core effort is -> 

Witness every occurrence

Witness every thought

Witness even the response

Not suppressing, not internally reacting or getting involved/attached with the external reaction, but knowing

Key Principle:

Kriya te karm

(Action is karma)

Upyog e dharm

(Pure awareness is dharma)

Parinaame bandh

(Bondage depends on inner state)

What Then is True Effort?

To ensure:

Actions may continue at the body level

But internally, awareness remains steady

Attachment and aversion gradually dissolve

Only then does karmic accumulation begin to reduce.

The Final Clarity:

The choice is subtle but absolute. 

Continue accumulating karma (even refined, even “good”)

OR

Move towards dissolution of karma

The second requires ->

Right vision

Right understanding

Right inner state

End Note:

Liberation is not an achievement in time.

It is the complete uncovering of the Soul’s true nature, free from all karmic coverings.

The journey has been infinite.

But the direction can change. And it can happen NOW.

11. The Infinite Journey.

 The current existence, by and large, is widely understood as a combination of the body (including skin, organs, internal and external systems, mind, heart, brain, and all functional aspects) and the soul (the energy, the force, the power, the very liveliness of existence).

As an analogy, consider a doll. The doll represents the body. When powered by batteries, it operates; in the absence of batteries, it becomes immobile.

The activities are not performed by the batteries themselves, yet without them, the doll cannot perform any activity.

So, is the doll the doer and the battery merely the power, the presence, the silent witness?

If this analogy holds, then the body appears as the doer, and the soul as the energy, the power, the existence, the witness, the knower.

In the absence of the soul, existence as we all perceive it vanishes. The identity through which a being was known to the world dissolves.

A simple example: when death occurs, what remains is referred to as a “body.” It is no longer addressed by the name it carried during life.

We say, “I passed away.”

The body remained.

This clearly indicates that the body and “I” are different.

So what was this “I” throughout the lifetime?

Was “I” merely the witness, the knower?

If "I" was the knower, then who was the doer? Was it the "body"?

Was I simply the knower of the doer?

If that is the case, then when the knower left, why was the doer unable to do anything?

And if I was the doer, why did I need the body at all to perform actions?

Throughout life, I identify myself as the “doer,” forgetting that I am fundamentally the “knower.”

The deeper insight is this: since infinity, at the core, I have been a knower. Yet, since that beginningless time (a notion that itself invites deep contemplation), I have been associated with karma. The deeper contemplation and the other perspectives are mentioned in the next blog. This one mainly focuses on the "knowership" perspective on the journey.

“Karma” and “I” are entirely different, yet tightly coupled.

Because of this association, I have been continuously identifying myself with karma and have been slipping into the zone of doership practically in the uninterrupted mode.

The irony is that with every instance of such identification and indulgence, more karma is attracted and accumulated.

The pile keeps growing endlessly because the identification with doership continues without interruption:

“I did this.”

“I did not do this.”

“That person did this to me.”

“They should not have done this to me.”

“I was affected, so now I will respond in a certain way (the response is in the doership mode).”

This cycle has been ongoing since an infinite past; so far back that no beginning can be established.

In fact, it appears there is no beginning at all. It is as paradoxical as asking: what came first, the chicken or the egg?

If one argues that there was a beginning, then what caused the pure knower (untainted and free) to first attract karma? In its pure state, the knower should have remained only a knower, free from doership.

So, let us proceed with the understanding that this association between the knower (self) and karma (doership) is beginningless.

Now, what happens if I continue indulging in doership without concern for karmic accumulation?

Naturally, karma will continue to pile up.

I might want to ask myself: So What?

Let it accumulate. Who cares?

Perhaps the reasoning follows: good karma will yield pleasant results, and bad karma will lead to suffering.

Ya, so I will simply focus on doing good karma.

But even here, complications arise.

There will be moments where short-term gains overshadow long-term consequences.

For example, if an opportunity arises to make money through a loophole / something that may go unnoticed, I might justify it. I may convince myself that it is acceptable, especially if my intention is not overtly harmful.

I might even reason: let me create comfort now, and from that comfort, I will do good deeds later and balance things out.

However, the law of karma does not function on personal justifications.

Every action has a precise consequence. Every consequence must be experienced. While there may be ways to mitigate or dilute karmic effects, those paths are disciplined and exacting.

Now, even if I commit to performing only good actions, another limitation arises.

As long as I operate from the identity of a “doer,” I remain within the karmic cycle.

Moreover, my ability to consistently act “well” depends on the stability of my senses, mind, and intellect. What happens when these are disturbed, weakened, or reversed?

At some point, I will falter.

And a single fall can trigger a chain of further karmic accumulation.

Karma continues to maintain its precise ledger.

The deeds of the past manifest as present circumstances. My response to these circumstances shapes future situations.

Thus, the cycle perpetuates.

In this way, I remain bound; never truly free from karma, whether auspicious (shubh) or inauspicious (ashubh).

As a knower, I am compelled to experience cycles of pleasure and pain, over and over again.

This leads to a fundamental question:

Is there a way to become free from all of this?

If such a path exists, why has liberation not occurred even once in this beginningless journey? And if liberation is attained, what is its nature?

Yes, there is a way. And it leads to a profound outcome.

The way is to remain in the state of witnessing; to observe what is happening without indulgence and without the sense of doership.

The practice appears simple, but its continuous and unwavering application is extremely challenging.

It requires:

No craving for the auspicious (shubh).

No aversion toward the inauspicious (ashubh).

A steady orientation toward the pure (shuddh).

To:

Experience the knower.

Know the experience(r).

Know the knower.

Experience the experience(r).

With sustained and sincere practice, this shift begins.

Initially, even this effort starts from a place of “doing.” But gradually, with consistency, the state of the knower begins to emerge naturally.

As this transition deepens, the impact of external and internal disturbances diminishes.

Inner cleansing begins.

The accumulated karmic load starts to reduce.

The knower recognizes this process; not as a doer, but as a witness to the gradual shedding.

Over time, purity begins to reveal itself, not as “purer” or “purest,” but as absolute purity.

Pure, in itself, is complete.

Nothing needs to be added to it.

Nothing can be taken away from it.

What happens when this pure state fully manifests?

The knower abides in its own nature; continuously, uninterruptedly, infinitely.

There is no end to this experience.

Just as there was no beginning to the cycles of suffering and perceived happiness, there is no end to the experience of the soul’s infinite qualities.

These include:

Anant Gyaan (infinite knowledge)

Anant Darshan (infinite faith)

Anant Charitra (infinite conduct)

Anant Virya (infinite energy)

Avyabaadh Sukh (unobstructed bliss)

Akshay Sthiti (eternal existence)

Arupipanu (formlessness)

Agurulaghutva (perfect equanimity)

This is not merely a philosophical framework. 

It is a direct pointer to the journey of the soul; bound since beginningless time, yet capable of a comprehensive freedom, rather freedom itself is comprehensive.

The bondage is real.

The cycle is real.

But so is liberation.

And the shift begins the moment the doer dissolves, and the knower stands revealed.

10. Crossing the Ocean.

Crossing the Ocean | A Choice, Not a Concept

Suddenly, I paused at a question that refuses to leave me now:

Do I truly want to cross the ocean of Sansar; or am I comfortable floating / sinking in it?

That pause exposed something uncomfortable.

For infinite time literally without beginning, this soul has remained bound in karmic bondage. Not because it had to, but because the default choice has always been the same: to continue, not to break.

I say “infinite” casually, but when examined, it is terrifying.

It means:

I have never experienced "absolute freedom".

I have never known what it means to exist without bondage.

I have only repeated cycles, endlessly. The cycle that has no beginning either.

Most of this journey has not even been as a human.

It has been in Sthaavar existence i.e. immobile, constrained, dependent. A state where even the possibility of conscious movement or choice does not exist.

That is not just a limitation. It is near-total helplessness.

From there, through an unimaginable struggle, Evolution happened.

From one-sensed to multi-sensed existence.

From immobility to movement.

And now, this Human birth.

Not ordinary. Exceptionally rare, truly extremely rarest of the rare. Even if it doesn't fit in the mind, it is unimaginably rarest of the rare.

Only here (in the Human birth) exists Vivek, the capacity to Discern.

Every other being lives.

Only a Human can choose the direction of existence.

The Brutal Reality

Even now, despite:

▪️A properly functioning body

▪️A stable life

▪️Access to knowledge

▪️Guidance from the enlightened

▪️Clarity about soul and karma

…the default tendency has remained unchanged:

And it is: To continue what has always been done.

Accumulate. React. Indulge. Repeat.

Even “good actions” often remain within the same loop of merit instead of liberation.

That is not freedom.

That is a more comfortable form of bondage.

The Core Error

The soul is not the doer; it is the knower.

Yet, by identifying with body, mind and actions,

it assumes doership and binds karma. 

This is not a small mistake.

This is the root of infinite suffering.

What Needs to Change

Not knowledge.

Not availability of path.

Not external conditions.

Only one thing: Decision (Nirnay).

A clean, irreversible shift:

From "continuing" the default cycle

To consciously "breaking" it

What does this "Decision" demands?

Relentless inner checking:

In this very moment, am I acting or merely witnessing?

Am I reinforcing identity, or dissolving it?

Am I accumulating, or freeing?

Am I aware, or mechanical?

Not occasionally.

Continuously.

No Illusions Left

If I do not change this now:

I return to the same cycle

The same patterns

The same bondage

And this exact combination of super precious Human birth, awareness, guidance, capability may not arise again for an incomprehensibly long time.

The Only Real Question

So the question is no longer philosophical.

It is immediate. 

It is Personal and Unavoidable.

Do I want to CROSS or NOT?

Because if the answer is yes,

then the delay is dishonesty; a dishonesty to myself incurring "my" loss, the loss that will cost the "Real Identity"

And if I am honest, then the only valid moment to flip the choice is: Not today, Not later. It is NOW

9. Happiness.

 H A P P I N E S S

A. Reflections on Perceived Happiness and Inner Direction

In the current state of non-enlightenment, whenever I refer to “I”, “me”, “my”, or “mine”, it is essentially tied to this body, mind, and the material identity that I have come to associate as myself.

The happiness that I assume or mentally label is, in truth, quite strange.

It isn’t really happiness, yet for the sake of expression, I accept it as such. Besides, what makes it even more peculiar is that there is nothing constant about it.

For some, happiness lies in accumulating money.

For others, in spending it.

Even within myself, at times I find happiness in saving, and at other times in spending freely.

Similarly:

For some, happiness is respect and recognition.

For others, it is material possessions.

For some, it lies in receiving without effort.

For others, in giving generously.

For some, it is in the sense of being the doer.

For others, in the sense of being the experiencer.

And if I continue to reflect, there are countless such variations.

Even in something as simple as lifestyle, if I live in a certain way, and someone else lives differently, merely observing and analysing their life generates in me a sense of happiness or unhappiness.

However, in reality, this too is a misperception; an illusion that I have accepted as real joy or sorrow.

B. The Distance from Natural Happiness

The idea that true happiness is simple and inherent feels distant to me.

For what feels like an eternity, I have evaluated happiness based on parameters viz. comparison, influence, control, comfort, release from burden, and so on.

Because of this conditioning, what is natural (sahaj) is not even recognized typically as happiness.

The statement “happiness is within” remains more of a conceptual quote; something to express outwardly, sometimes even to create an impression that I understand it rather than something deeply realized.

C. Comfort, Substitution, and the Mind’s Adjustments

In practical life, my sense of happiness often operates through substitution.

If I step out of one comfort zone, I instinctively seek another.

For example, if I restrict my eating, there may be discomfort at a core level. But then, another layer of comfort arises; perhaps in the form of recognition, validation, or identity (“people should know I am doing this”).

So, the mind compensates.

The shift is not away from dependence. It is merely from one form of dependence to another.

D. Influence of Norms and Social Conditioning

When a behavior becomes normalized by the collective, the mind readily accepts it.

For instance, if going out to eat becomes a social norm, the mind finds comfort in aligning with it. The action is then justified as “There is no harm”.

On the other hand, when something is labelled as a “vice”, the same mind becomes burdened even if the inner inclination exists.

Interestingly, if that same “vice” is allowed in a different environment or context, it is performed with ease, even enthusiasm.

This reveals that the burden or freedom is not inherent in the act itself, but in the belief system surrounding it.

E. Restriction, Indulgence, and the Spring Effect

There are times when I restrain myself strongly like compressing a spring.

And then there are times when I release completely leading to overindulgence.

In restriction, there can be internal burden.

In indulgence, there can be unconsciousness and / or a feeling of intoxication.

Both extremes carry their own forms of imbalance.

For example, on certain days I may avoid specific foods with a strong sense of discipline and identity, believing I am doing something meaningful.

Yet on other days, I may consume the same without awareness and with immense indulgence.

This raises a deeper question:

Is the awareness consistent, or is it situational?

F. Two Parallel Domains of Living

There appear to be two distinct domains in life:

1. The Body–Mind Domain

This includes physical needs, habits, beliefs, preferences, and social conditioning; and it certainly limited to this lifetime (the current human birth).

2. The Soul–Spiritual Domain

This relates to the eternal; inner clarity, awareness, and liberation.

While the higher purpose lies in the upliftment of the soul, the body and mind cannot be ignored.

However, the key lies in balance, caring for the body without becoming consumed by it or supressing it to such an extent that everything (lower / higher purpose) goes for a toss.

G. Choice, Direction, and Consequence

Ultimately, it comes down to choices I make.

If I invest all my time and energy in nurturing the body, mind, and associated beliefs, I will receive outcomes aligned with that.

If I invest in inner purification and spiritual clarity, the results will reflect that direction.

If I mix both unconsciously, without clarity, I risk causing more confusion than growth.

However, a conscious balance where both are addressed with awareness, may serve the journey better.

H. A Subtle Shift in Understanding Happiness

Perhaps the goal is not to chase or define happiness with labels like “pure”, “natural”, or “eternal”.

Perhaps happiness, in its truest sense, does not need qualification.

What matters is vigilance i.e. Observing how perceived happiness operates, how it shifts, how it deceives, and how it conditions choices.

Through that awareness, the movement may naturally shift; from assumed happiness toward what simply is.

I. What Next?

A next layer could be: not choosing between the duality, but observing who is choosing and why!