Since my mom had gone out of station, I was all alone. Although it was a Saturday night, I just planned to laze at home, sit back, watch television and peacefully sleep. I did so.
It was 7.30 am when my eyeballs hit the clock. It was a bit early for a Sunday morning but since I was up and fresh, I decided to go for a stroll. While stepping down, I saw my milkman stepping up and expressed that I don’t want milk. He gave a surreal look and before his response or my analysis, I jumped down to the ground level. Something was eccentric in the milkman’s look but then I didn’t care much thinking he might be a victim of hangover since it was a Sunday morning for him as well.
Passing thru my lane, I encountered my friend’s dad who was in his temple gear. Worshipping God in the morning is his daily routine. Most of the times when I see him, he is usually in his own world chanting something. Ditto this time. Still I thought of bidding a hello and when I did so, he looked at me but didn’t respond back. I was aghast but then assuming he must be in his godly thoughts, I resumed my walk. I was still wondering about back to back similar events nonetheless.
With all those thoughts gradually evaporating, I had a nice 30 minute walk. Hungry, I entered my favorite eatery and took some food coupons. Despite a busy morning, the coupon vendor still managed to response to my ‘happy morning’ greeting. I was happy assuming he recognized me but still not completely satisfied as he just responded with his heads down engrossed in catering to other customers.
After a wonderful breakfast as soon as I popped out of the restaurant, I witness a friend of mine from a certain distance cruising on his bike and as he passed perpendicular, I waved my hand. It seemed like he had simply ignored it. I consoled my mind explaining it must be because of a lot of crowd around; the wave must have gone unnoticed.
The mind was not ready to get convinced and as a result of which a lot of questions started haunting around. Walking down further, I could see my gym instructor approaching. This was an acid test for me. I rushed towards him, gave a broad smile and uttered ‘Hello’. He gave a smile in return and said the same. I was relieved. Before my breaths stay calm for even a degree movement of the second hand of the clock, he quoted – “Are you interested in joining gym?”
I almost fainted. It was like I had lost all my senses. I not only failed the acid test but my identity too. I couldn’t see any difference in strangers and acquaintances. On the verge of a volcanic eruption in my mind, I heard the same question again. I negatively nodded and rushed towards my house.
On my way back, I encountered the newspaper vendor and a local grocery store owner. Needless to say, both of them failed to recognize me. I just wanted to reach home at the earliest and hit the bed. Meanwhile, I thought I won’t even attempt to initiate with anyone I meet during my journey towards home.
While walking, suddenly I had a thought of calling up my mom and talking to her for a while. I felt that could be the best option to soothe myself and my wicked mind that was still pestering me to the core.
I took the deepest breath of my life and called my mom. The heartache that followed was deeper than the deepest breath I just took. It happened at the following moment when my own mom responded the call saying – “Whose this?”
Stunned, I froze. Wasn’t this the most horrifying question of my life? No. The next one was worse when I asked myself – Which life am I referring to? I was lost to such an extent that I started questioning myself about my own identity.
Who am I? Where did I come from? Where am I gonna go?
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Sunday, January 31, 2010
2. Rann.
Seldom I go for a bollywood movie with heaps of expectations and all the more rarely are they fulfilled to the entirety. Rann is certainly one of those very few.
Although I won’t say that RGV is at his best but still this one comes very close to Company and Sarkar that were his best creations so far in my opinion.
The concept of showcasing of cold wars and dirty politics is not new (remember Corporate) although the medium is. One thing is certain that RGV cannot expect media to promote this fare (they have already started criticizing it big time) but as if does it care since he is sure that masses are here to do the needful.
Coming to the experience, I would say it was an edge-of-the-seat drama. Usually thrillers are categorized as e-o-t-s. In flicks with such a sensitive subject treatment matters a lot and that’s where this one scores ten on ten. Like many of his previous movies, the camera placement (weird angles-face hiding-close ups), background score (news recite, typical slogans) and editing are first rate.
The sequence of events is breathtaking. In the game of cricket, like a batsman on the crease, each character is given footage and the best part is everyone has scored a century. There are many scenes where I could see the Madhur effect. It seemed as if disciple has taught his master but I reckon somewhere master would have already trained his disciple who turned out to be the first to implement it. Doesn’t matter me anyways.
The casting is simply stupendous. Bachchan as anticipated is impeccable. Deshmukh shines. Yadav is wasted to an extent; nonetheless he is able to create some light moments. Kapoor gives complete justice to his character. Rawal is apt. Behl is astonishing. I have never before admired his performance. Girls have nothing much to do but they don’t look out of the place. Gul, Suchitra, Neetu, Simone and Mrinal add to the fragrance. Over and above, Sudeep as Jay Vijay Malik steals the show and I won’t be surprised if he bags a few awards. I was looking for a KK (remember Vishnu of Sarkar) in him but that is something I should have not done. He leaves a lasting impact. I might just watch Phoonk-2 for him(?)
Overall, this new(s) battle is a must watch. My verdict – 8.5/10.
Although I won’t say that RGV is at his best but still this one comes very close to Company and Sarkar that were his best creations so far in my opinion.
The concept of showcasing of cold wars and dirty politics is not new (remember Corporate) although the medium is. One thing is certain that RGV cannot expect media to promote this fare (they have already started criticizing it big time) but as if does it care since he is sure that masses are here to do the needful.
Coming to the experience, I would say it was an edge-of-the-seat drama. Usually thrillers are categorized as e-o-t-s. In flicks with such a sensitive subject treatment matters a lot and that’s where this one scores ten on ten. Like many of his previous movies, the camera placement (weird angles-face hiding-close ups), background score (news recite, typical slogans) and editing are first rate.
The sequence of events is breathtaking. In the game of cricket, like a batsman on the crease, each character is given footage and the best part is everyone has scored a century. There are many scenes where I could see the Madhur effect. It seemed as if disciple has taught his master but I reckon somewhere master would have already trained his disciple who turned out to be the first to implement it. Doesn’t matter me anyways.
The casting is simply stupendous. Bachchan as anticipated is impeccable. Deshmukh shines. Yadav is wasted to an extent; nonetheless he is able to create some light moments. Kapoor gives complete justice to his character. Rawal is apt. Behl is astonishing. I have never before admired his performance. Girls have nothing much to do but they don’t look out of the place. Gul, Suchitra, Neetu, Simone and Mrinal add to the fragrance. Over and above, Sudeep as Jay Vijay Malik steals the show and I won’t be surprised if he bags a few awards. I was looking for a KK (remember Vishnu of Sarkar) in him but that is something I should have not done. He leaves a lasting impact. I might just watch Phoonk-2 for him(?)
Overall, this new(s) battle is a must watch. My verdict – 8.5/10.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
1. Am I an Idiot?
Recently I saw a movie wherein the message given was – ‘Don’t run behind success. Strive for excellence. Once you excel, success will certainly run behind you.’ Very nice point.
Now, to achieve excellence it was said that one needs to define own ways by transcending the typecast system of education and follow the passion to avert a life full of incompleteness and dissatisfaction.
True to an extent but then following the passion right from any particular point doesn’t really work completely for me. I am talking from a perspective where I need to earn bread and butter which is the need of the time. Well, I am not saying that I am killing my passion but postponing the focus on it while not completely forgetting it.
For instance (just a fictitious example), my parents somehow managed to make me an engineer and in the midst of it, I realized that my passion was literature. I don’t say that writers don’t make money but to establish myself as a writer may take a few months or a few years or may be ages whereas by possessing an engineering degree, chances are high that I can find a nice job and earn a handful in few years. I can set a target for myself and plan to retire from that so-called ‘typecast’ profession after those few years.
Meanwhile, simultaneously I can find some spare time discovering literature and exploring the potential. Once I achieve my target, I can move on (to literature) full time. All my further targets till the end of life may be quite possibly related to literature – publishing books, composing poems, etc. This way I can plan my life and don’t end up frustrating – neither for the lack of money nor for the unfulfilled passion.
I don’t know if I am an idiot to think this.
Now, to achieve excellence it was said that one needs to define own ways by transcending the typecast system of education and follow the passion to avert a life full of incompleteness and dissatisfaction.
True to an extent but then following the passion right from any particular point doesn’t really work completely for me. I am talking from a perspective where I need to earn bread and butter which is the need of the time. Well, I am not saying that I am killing my passion but postponing the focus on it while not completely forgetting it.
For instance (just a fictitious example), my parents somehow managed to make me an engineer and in the midst of it, I realized that my passion was literature. I don’t say that writers don’t make money but to establish myself as a writer may take a few months or a few years or may be ages whereas by possessing an engineering degree, chances are high that I can find a nice job and earn a handful in few years. I can set a target for myself and plan to retire from that so-called ‘typecast’ profession after those few years.
Meanwhile, simultaneously I can find some spare time discovering literature and exploring the potential. Once I achieve my target, I can move on (to literature) full time. All my further targets till the end of life may be quite possibly related to literature – publishing books, composing poems, etc. This way I can plan my life and don’t end up frustrating – neither for the lack of money nor for the unfulfilled passion.
I don’t know if I am an idiot to think this.
Monday, December 21, 2009
3. Value.
One of my friends informed me a couple of days back that his kid dropped his cell phone in a bucket filled with some liquid. Needless to say, his phone was conked off. Although it was a loss for him, I was smiling mainly because the cell didn’t belong to me. Nevertheless, the visualization was hilarious too. I am sure he would have also smirked looking at his kid performing this innocently naughty act.
Why do some things which are entertaining in nature create a little or more grief within? This was the thought that passed by. I believe, just because I add value to all the things I possess, I overlook the entertainment value. I know this is a sort of debatable statement where one can argue saying that if the same kind of entertainment is achieved without wasting valuable resources, then why not? This is true but my point is what ever has happened which actually can create entertainment, what is the point in weeping about the loss? Rather, why not simply enjoy it to the fullest?
I am not finger-pointing at any one as this is most applicable to me.
Why do some things which are entertaining in nature create a little or more grief within? This was the thought that passed by. I believe, just because I add value to all the things I possess, I overlook the entertainment value. I know this is a sort of debatable statement where one can argue saying that if the same kind of entertainment is achieved without wasting valuable resources, then why not? This is true but my point is what ever has happened which actually can create entertainment, what is the point in weeping about the loss? Rather, why not simply enjoy it to the fullest?
I am not finger-pointing at any one as this is most applicable to me.
2. Speed-breaker.
Each weekday, while I commute to work I come across a few speed-breakers on my way. Some of them are tiny ones whereas some are more swollen. I observe that those bulgy ones are kinda not-so-annoying. However those smaller ones are bothersome. They generate more jerks and end-up frustrating me no matter how much ever I slow down my vehicle.
This brings to my notice that all those so-defined big things in life viz. career, growth, planning, long-term goals, etc don’t bother me every now and then but when I come across pretty trivial hiccups, they make me furious and create a whole lot of aggravation within and outside.
These irrelevant ones can be anything like some one hurting me, no one caring about me, driver in the next lane abusing while passing, unsolicited advices, people (and also PC) not responding quickly, a friend not inviting me for a party / wedding, people not acknowledging my presence, no recognition for my work / achievement, people expecting me to behave the way they want me to behave, I expecting people to behave the way I want them to behave, so on so forth and beyond…the list is certainly near-endless…
All I can see is these things are like a bunch of clouds hovering over the Sun (which has a potential of sourcing out infinite light) hiding all its power.
The list of insignificant ones has created a lot of significance in my life – What an Irony!
This brings to my notice that all those so-defined big things in life viz. career, growth, planning, long-term goals, etc don’t bother me every now and then but when I come across pretty trivial hiccups, they make me furious and create a whole lot of aggravation within and outside.
These irrelevant ones can be anything like some one hurting me, no one caring about me, driver in the next lane abusing while passing, unsolicited advices, people (and also PC) not responding quickly, a friend not inviting me for a party / wedding, people not acknowledging my presence, no recognition for my work / achievement, people expecting me to behave the way they want me to behave, I expecting people to behave the way I want them to behave, so on so forth and beyond…the list is certainly near-endless…
All I can see is these things are like a bunch of clouds hovering over the Sun (which has a potential of sourcing out infinite light) hiding all its power.
The list of insignificant ones has created a lot of significance in my life – What an Irony!
1. One year.
Last year on the same date (19/12), I had traveled to a varied geography in southern hemisphere where I had never landed before in this birth. It was a place called Wellington. In the wildest of my dreams I hadn’t thought I would be stopping by that place anytime in my life and that too for few long months.
The place was new and so were people. This is common in the Industry I work. While putting my feet on the ground, I had a lot of queries floating in my mind but actually wasn’t looking for any answers as after nearly 30 hours of sleepless journey and losing 6.5 hours due to time zone change, I was looking for a place to doze off.
Well, this write up is not about my travel. Neither it is about my experience with the place. This is a tiny gesture of remembering those dynamic young chaps, who were nothing more than unknown faces before I traveled and soon became a vital phase of my life.
There are umpteen words to describe these pals, lots of experiences to share, many memories to cherish and a number of reasons to feel nostalgic but for a couple of reasons, I would like to apply brakes to my thought process – a) I am sure I would not be able to justify the thrill through the medium of words and b) Those who haven’t experienced might not find it interesting.
However, before I close my eyes and think about them, I cannot stop myself from taking a glance over my entire stay and what flashes in front of me is – Walking on the waterfront, Xmas time, Pebble beach at Napier, Bungee Jump at Huka Falls, Bickering at work, SRK, Driving thrills with almost all possible Toyotas and a Santa Fe, Cops and Tickets, Beaches unlimited, Playing with Map, Hogging over food, Taupo Tandem Sky diving, Pizza making, Monopoly & Cards, Photography at Dawson falls, Encounter with team India at the Basin Reserve, Busy eating Pizzas at Taupo forgetting starving Girls, Shopping at Cuba, Mamra (Indian snacks at Invincible), Smiley cards, Brainstorming with an aim of creating a consulting powerhouse, Late night binges, Movie-filled weekends, Dawaat & Tulsi & Hare Krishna and beyond, Kilberney temple tours, Metro on Willis, Lord of the rings, South Island excursion, Rugby and Cricket games at the Westpac stadium, Round the bay t-shirts, Mosheims,… O my God, the list is endless. I wonder what will happen when I start penning down an autobiography J
Time to close eyes... Love you folks…
Dedicating this piece with lots and lots of love towards all those wonders and our adhesively strong bonding
The place was new and so were people. This is common in the Industry I work. While putting my feet on the ground, I had a lot of queries floating in my mind but actually wasn’t looking for any answers as after nearly 30 hours of sleepless journey and losing 6.5 hours due to time zone change, I was looking for a place to doze off.
Well, this write up is not about my travel. Neither it is about my experience with the place. This is a tiny gesture of remembering those dynamic young chaps, who were nothing more than unknown faces before I traveled and soon became a vital phase of my life.
There are umpteen words to describe these pals, lots of experiences to share, many memories to cherish and a number of reasons to feel nostalgic but for a couple of reasons, I would like to apply brakes to my thought process – a) I am sure I would not be able to justify the thrill through the medium of words and b) Those who haven’t experienced might not find it interesting.
However, before I close my eyes and think about them, I cannot stop myself from taking a glance over my entire stay and what flashes in front of me is – Walking on the waterfront, Xmas time, Pebble beach at Napier, Bungee Jump at Huka Falls, Bickering at work, SRK, Driving thrills with almost all possible Toyotas and a Santa Fe, Cops and Tickets, Beaches unlimited, Playing with Map, Hogging over food, Taupo Tandem Sky diving, Pizza making, Monopoly & Cards, Photography at Dawson falls, Encounter with team India at the Basin Reserve, Busy eating Pizzas at Taupo forgetting starving Girls, Shopping at Cuba, Mamra (Indian snacks at Invincible), Smiley cards, Brainstorming with an aim of creating a consulting powerhouse, Late night binges, Movie-filled weekends, Dawaat & Tulsi & Hare Krishna and beyond, Kilberney temple tours, Metro on Willis, Lord of the rings, South Island excursion, Rugby and Cricket games at the Westpac stadium, Round the bay t-shirts, Mosheims,… O my God, the list is endless. I wonder what will happen when I start penning down an autobiography J
Time to close eyes... Love you folks…
Dedicating this piece with lots and lots of love towards all those wonders and our adhesively strong bonding
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
1. Religion.
Background: I am a part of an institute where we are taught about Religion (twice a week 1.5 hour each session). Last week, we finished 17 years. I thought of penning down my thoughts on that occasion.
I am not sure how much of this will interest you. If you wish, you can read in your leisure time (since it’s a long one). Please feel free to comment.
At the age of 13 (i.e. 1992 – Yes, I am 30+ now), religion for me was to follow some rituals, offer prayers to God and seek blessings in return. This was to be religiously followed but of course not at the top most priority. For instance, if I got to go for some urgent work, it was ok for me to skip the prayers as if God will easily forgive me. I never had any thoughts and feelings of priority and severity towards religion.
On the contrary, my parents would boast quoting me as a religious boy of the family. I would also think so to a greater extent. The reason being I would attend a lot of religious seminars, give a lot of exams, score great marks, publicly speak about religion and regularly be in touch with saints and dignitaries in the arena. This much was more than enough for my parents and me to feel proud about.
There was no focus of going ahead and becoming a saintly being as I had always aimed at becoming a professional and earn more and more money. Now, there was an illusion that religion can be taken care off (the way it is described in the opening lines) while enjoying worldly pleasures. This is the way almost everyone around me would live thinking that this is the way it is supposed to be lived.
Preachers would say – Do as much religious activities as you can and be as much religious as possible. These words would actually mean – Do as much (depending on my schedule) religious activities as I can and be as much religious (as per my comforts and convenience) as possible. The result of this would be ending up doing as little in the name of religion and flatter as much in the society and hence creating a goody goody impression.
Yes, at the age of 13 all these things would happen. I don’t say that it doesn’t happen today. The difference is being blindfolded, crossing the street, meeting with an accident and with open eyes, crossing the street and still meeting with an accident. Nevertheless, it’s certainly necessary to open the eyes than remain blindfolded for life.
Coming to the story - during November 1992, one of my friends asked me to join a religious class. With so many so-called ‘religious’ feathers in my cap, I agreed with an intention to check it out. There was this class conducted by a 31 something handsome chap (everyone called him Sir) and the best part was it would be only once a week for an hour unlike the other class I would go each day of the week. Additionally, there was nothing to mug up which truly fascinated me (again unlike the other class where they would make us learn and mug up everything in Sanskrit with no idea about the meaning and the logic behind it)
We were a bunch of 25 odd students in the institute and I started liking it there. Using several examples, we were taught that the soul and body are different; the existence of this being is known by the existence of soul and so on. Now this was like a revolution for me who had all the times learned and understood about God and the rituals to be blindly followed without questioning the logic since questioning was synonymous to doubting and doubting (God) would be considered as one of the biggest sin.
Who am I? We had to enquire about self. Never in my life such a thought had passed my mind and this really started captivating me all the more. Well, if I am Dilip, rather if this body is given the name Dilip, will it still remain Dilip after I die? Yes, the identity would but then what about the existence? Man! At the age of 13, actually it was a bit too much. However, it was thought provoking too.
Sir would illustrate theories using different practical examples. One of them would be a dancing doll example where in he would say that if the batteries are charged, the doll can dance and if they are discharged, the movement stops. Similarly, once the soul disappears, the body movement stops. Why it happens so? What happens to the soul? Where does it go? After it disappears, the body still looks as it was appearing earlier. So which part of the body was actually the soul? What could be the shape and size of the soul?
I would wonder – Do the above questions have anything to do with religion? Are these questions really vital to comprehend and supposed to be answered by someone? Is there a need to quit the existing world and start a hunt for the replies of all of the above?
Gradually, these sessions started becoming interesting on one hand and also routine on the other. The bonding with Sir and the entire group started becoming stronger. After around a year, Sir proposed us to go on a 3-day tour. The agenda was to discuss religion at a stretch. I was keen but also was a bit concerned as I was in my last year of school and my exams were just a month away. Still, I don’t know what influenced me and I said yes. I can say this was one of the best choices I made in my life. It was a fantastic experience. I started getting more and more involved in this group and adapted to the culture. There was one more tour during the same year and this time I was all the more excited since I was free from exams and studies.
Alongside religious teachings and discourses, Sir would always preach a practical way of life. In the backdrop of soul-searching inquiries and religious deeds, he would always put weight on a way of life. A person practicing religion has to be leading an honest and a non-hypocritical life and act his role as a human being in such a way that no living creature is physically, mentally, verbally and emotionally harmed by his existence. This was his definition of a non-violent and a truthful lifestyle. I was thoroughly impressed and influenced with this philosophy although to be honest, I don’t practice it to the fullest till date.
In day-to-day life, there are so many theories which one can implement and lead a life in such a way that everyone including self can stay happy and peaceful. To him, this was a pre-requisite. These theories did include commitment, dedication, sincerity, time-management, hard work, there is nothing like try, be un-reasonable (means do not defend yourself), harmless external behavior, lack of hyper aggression, not sweating the small stuff, consider everything as a small stuff , introspection of thoughts, self-analysis (daily, hourly), break the flow of excitement, don’t exploit anyone, Remember, my profit can be some one’s loss, live in present, accept things the way they are and the way they come to us, avoid conflicts – come what may, discourage corruption, cleansing of thoughts, positive thinking, ego eradication, smile & make everyone smile, seek forgiveness, friendship with all and animosity with none, become a helping hand, generosity, philanthropy, compassion for all living beings – from ant to dinosaur, take the responsibility – I am sole responsible, realize the difference between ‘doing’ and ‘being’, if I love to be happy all creatures love to be happy, if I don’t like pain, no creature does, no need to get stuck on the medium if you want to reach the goal, and the ultimate was “To sing a song, you need to sing a song”.
These theories were exemplified in such a practical manner that I would really love to apply them in my personal life and needless to say that it has truly benefited me though the thick and thin of my life.
Sir would always motivate and recommend us for enrolling in various self-help workshops & meditation courses like vipassana, visiting worthwhile places & exhibitions, watching relevant movies, reading books & articles for self-development and in short, everything that stimulated him and made him grow in his life.
Besides, there were many tours and pilgrimages (almost twice a year) that really would serve as chargers. Through the means of quizzes, debates, scripts, games, elocutions and discussions, we would learn a lot, explore the hidden potential and experience the bliss within. I did relish each of the outstation tours and also all the sessions and conversations happened during past years.
I don’t intend to break anyone’s notions or beliefs but in this institute of religion, with all credits to Sir, I learned that Religion is not a part of life but it is a way of life.
It’s been 17 years and I am still learning and shall continue to learn. There are no words to express the gratitude towards Sir. Whatever I express will seem to be exaggerative but factually and on the contrary, it would just be a less than a drop in an ocean. Besides, there were so many other people who supported Sir to a great extent and these people were none other than his own family – his son, his wife, his brother, his mom and dad and his uncle. From the bottom of my heart, I would like to salute each one of them for everything and beyond.
I would like to conclude by saying that all the positive side one sees in me is due to Sir and the engagement with this institute since 17 years and all the negative side of mine is due to my deeds and behavior. I wish and anticipate a life-long commitment.
Thank you very much for patiently reading through the entire piece.
I am not sure how much of this will interest you. If you wish, you can read in your leisure time (since it’s a long one). Please feel free to comment.
At the age of 13 (i.e. 1992 – Yes, I am 30+ now), religion for me was to follow some rituals, offer prayers to God and seek blessings in return. This was to be religiously followed but of course not at the top most priority. For instance, if I got to go for some urgent work, it was ok for me to skip the prayers as if God will easily forgive me. I never had any thoughts and feelings of priority and severity towards religion.
On the contrary, my parents would boast quoting me as a religious boy of the family. I would also think so to a greater extent. The reason being I would attend a lot of religious seminars, give a lot of exams, score great marks, publicly speak about religion and regularly be in touch with saints and dignitaries in the arena. This much was more than enough for my parents and me to feel proud about.
There was no focus of going ahead and becoming a saintly being as I had always aimed at becoming a professional and earn more and more money. Now, there was an illusion that religion can be taken care off (the way it is described in the opening lines) while enjoying worldly pleasures. This is the way almost everyone around me would live thinking that this is the way it is supposed to be lived.
Preachers would say – Do as much religious activities as you can and be as much religious as possible. These words would actually mean – Do as much (depending on my schedule) religious activities as I can and be as much religious (as per my comforts and convenience) as possible. The result of this would be ending up doing as little in the name of religion and flatter as much in the society and hence creating a goody goody impression.
Yes, at the age of 13 all these things would happen. I don’t say that it doesn’t happen today. The difference is being blindfolded, crossing the street, meeting with an accident and with open eyes, crossing the street and still meeting with an accident. Nevertheless, it’s certainly necessary to open the eyes than remain blindfolded for life.
Coming to the story - during November 1992, one of my friends asked me to join a religious class. With so many so-called ‘religious’ feathers in my cap, I agreed with an intention to check it out. There was this class conducted by a 31 something handsome chap (everyone called him Sir) and the best part was it would be only once a week for an hour unlike the other class I would go each day of the week. Additionally, there was nothing to mug up which truly fascinated me (again unlike the other class where they would make us learn and mug up everything in Sanskrit with no idea about the meaning and the logic behind it)
We were a bunch of 25 odd students in the institute and I started liking it there. Using several examples, we were taught that the soul and body are different; the existence of this being is known by the existence of soul and so on. Now this was like a revolution for me who had all the times learned and understood about God and the rituals to be blindly followed without questioning the logic since questioning was synonymous to doubting and doubting (God) would be considered as one of the biggest sin.
Who am I? We had to enquire about self. Never in my life such a thought had passed my mind and this really started captivating me all the more. Well, if I am Dilip, rather if this body is given the name Dilip, will it still remain Dilip after I die? Yes, the identity would but then what about the existence? Man! At the age of 13, actually it was a bit too much. However, it was thought provoking too.
Sir would illustrate theories using different practical examples. One of them would be a dancing doll example where in he would say that if the batteries are charged, the doll can dance and if they are discharged, the movement stops. Similarly, once the soul disappears, the body movement stops. Why it happens so? What happens to the soul? Where does it go? After it disappears, the body still looks as it was appearing earlier. So which part of the body was actually the soul? What could be the shape and size of the soul?
I would wonder – Do the above questions have anything to do with religion? Are these questions really vital to comprehend and supposed to be answered by someone? Is there a need to quit the existing world and start a hunt for the replies of all of the above?
Gradually, these sessions started becoming interesting on one hand and also routine on the other. The bonding with Sir and the entire group started becoming stronger. After around a year, Sir proposed us to go on a 3-day tour. The agenda was to discuss religion at a stretch. I was keen but also was a bit concerned as I was in my last year of school and my exams were just a month away. Still, I don’t know what influenced me and I said yes. I can say this was one of the best choices I made in my life. It was a fantastic experience. I started getting more and more involved in this group and adapted to the culture. There was one more tour during the same year and this time I was all the more excited since I was free from exams and studies.
Alongside religious teachings and discourses, Sir would always preach a practical way of life. In the backdrop of soul-searching inquiries and religious deeds, he would always put weight on a way of life. A person practicing religion has to be leading an honest and a non-hypocritical life and act his role as a human being in such a way that no living creature is physically, mentally, verbally and emotionally harmed by his existence. This was his definition of a non-violent and a truthful lifestyle. I was thoroughly impressed and influenced with this philosophy although to be honest, I don’t practice it to the fullest till date.
In day-to-day life, there are so many theories which one can implement and lead a life in such a way that everyone including self can stay happy and peaceful. To him, this was a pre-requisite. These theories did include commitment, dedication, sincerity, time-management, hard work, there is nothing like try, be un-reasonable (means do not defend yourself), harmless external behavior, lack of hyper aggression, not sweating the small stuff, consider everything as a small stuff , introspection of thoughts, self-analysis (daily, hourly), break the flow of excitement, don’t exploit anyone, Remember, my profit can be some one’s loss, live in present, accept things the way they are and the way they come to us, avoid conflicts – come what may, discourage corruption, cleansing of thoughts, positive thinking, ego eradication, smile & make everyone smile, seek forgiveness, friendship with all and animosity with none, become a helping hand, generosity, philanthropy, compassion for all living beings – from ant to dinosaur, take the responsibility – I am sole responsible, realize the difference between ‘doing’ and ‘being’, if I love to be happy all creatures love to be happy, if I don’t like pain, no creature does, no need to get stuck on the medium if you want to reach the goal, and the ultimate was “To sing a song, you need to sing a song”.
These theories were exemplified in such a practical manner that I would really love to apply them in my personal life and needless to say that it has truly benefited me though the thick and thin of my life.
Sir would always motivate and recommend us for enrolling in various self-help workshops & meditation courses like vipassana, visiting worthwhile places & exhibitions, watching relevant movies, reading books & articles for self-development and in short, everything that stimulated him and made him grow in his life.
Besides, there were many tours and pilgrimages (almost twice a year) that really would serve as chargers. Through the means of quizzes, debates, scripts, games, elocutions and discussions, we would learn a lot, explore the hidden potential and experience the bliss within. I did relish each of the outstation tours and also all the sessions and conversations happened during past years.
I don’t intend to break anyone’s notions or beliefs but in this institute of religion, with all credits to Sir, I learned that Religion is not a part of life but it is a way of life.
It’s been 17 years and I am still learning and shall continue to learn. There are no words to express the gratitude towards Sir. Whatever I express will seem to be exaggerative but factually and on the contrary, it would just be a less than a drop in an ocean. Besides, there were so many other people who supported Sir to a great extent and these people were none other than his own family – his son, his wife, his brother, his mom and dad and his uncle. From the bottom of my heart, I would like to salute each one of them for everything and beyond.
I would like to conclude by saying that all the positive side one sees in me is due to Sir and the engagement with this institute since 17 years and all the negative side of mine is due to my deeds and behavior. I wish and anticipate a life-long commitment.
Thank you very much for patiently reading through the entire piece.
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